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Spotlight

Victim's Program

Who Is Eligible for the Program?

FVIP's Victim's Program is open to volunteer clients who need help or are seeking information about domestic violence. Other clients may be mandated to attend FVIP by referral sources such as: judges and magistrates, probation and parole officers, and the Department of Social Services. Other referral sources include: law enforcement officers, victim advocates, counselors/therapists, attorneys, and health care providers.

The program is designed for persons 18 years of age or older, however, clients younger than 18 will be considered on an individual basis.

FVIP reserves the right to accept or reject any referred or voluntary client.

Am I Being Victimized?

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Are you afraid of your partner or are your children afraid?
  • Does your partner try to control your life?
  • Does your partner call you names or say things to upset you?
  • When your partner mistreats you, do you get blamed?
  • Does your partner blame his behavior on alcohol, stress or family problems?
  • Does your partner pressure you to do what he wants, even when you do not want to do it?
  • Has your partner ever cheated on you?
  • Is your partner jealous or possessive?
  • Has your partner ever prevented you from leaving?
  • Has your partner ever threatened to hit or hurt you?
  • Has your partner ever pushed, grabbed, hit, intimidated or frightened you?
  • Has your partner every threatened suicide, homicide, or to hurt your children, friends, or family?
  • Has your partner ever threatened you with a gun, knife, or other weapon?
  • Has your partner ever destroyed or damaged any of your, or your family's, belongings (including car)?
  • Has your partner ever physically forced you to have sex?
  • Has your partner ever driven recklessly or illegally with you or your children in car, including driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs?
  • Has your partner ever stalked you or forced you to carry a beeper or cell phone in order to know where you are and what you are doing?

    • If your answer is "YES" to any of these questions, you may benefit from our program. Our experience shows that once a person begins to abuse, he has a problem that is likely to get worse. Men often feel guilty and apologetic after an abusive incident. Many promise themselves and their partners that they will change. Unfortunately, even with the best intentions, most do not stop being abusive without outside assistance.

    Safety and Emotional Health

    The experience of being abused and verbally degraded is usually exhausting and emotionally draining. The process of building a new life takes courage and energy. To conserve your emotional energy and resources and to avoid hard emotional times, try doing some of the following:

    Use "I can" statements with yourself and be assertive with others.

    Examples:

    If I feel down and ready to return to an abusive situation, I can...

    When I have to communicate with my partner in person or by telephone, I can...

    When I feel that others are trying to control me, I can...

    To make myself feel stronger, I can read ...

    When I need support or a shoulder to cry on, I can call ...

    Things that I could do or learn that would help me feel stronger are ...

    Things that I could do or learn that would help me to become more independent are ...

    To help gain support and strengthen relationships with others, I can attend workshops or support groups or ...

    Some comments from recent graduates

    "Everyone here has been very supportive and helpful beyond just the classes or counseling. The people that work at Compass of Carolina make Compass of Carolina. They all have gone beyond the call of duty for me."

    "This program taught me how to be open and stand up for myself. It has also helped me to (use) better judgment."

    "What helped me the most is just being around others that could relate to what I was going through and not being judged or made to feel like the situation I was in was my fault."

    "By coming here I have learned how important communication is in a relationship."